The Umberto Eco Personality Sorter

This is a user-written personality test created with the Personality Test Generator. Rum and Monkey isn't responsible for its content, however good or bad it may be.

In Foucault's Pendulum (clicky!), Umberto Eco describes four kinds of people:

Take this handy-dandy test to find out which one you are!

{Dottore Eco, se leggete mai questo, rispettosamente, questo è un omaggio.}

Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

MONGO HUNGRY

No eggs, please; they make me flatulent.

Not all eggs come from chickens.

I refuse to respond until you confirm that both are 100% organic and free-range.

 

Is the glass half empty or half full?

MONGO THIRSTY

I say, is that the glass I left my teeth in?

Not every worldview is based on a moral dichotomy.

You damn well better recycle that glass, motherfucker.

 

What is the meaning of life?

WANT PUPPY

The cereal or the magazine?

Whatever you put into it. Ergo, anyone who always does right will necessarily lead a comfortable, happy, fulfilled life. The plebian version is reaping what one sows.

LIFE IS PAIN!!! LIFE IS DEATH!!! WE'RE KILLING THE EARTH!!

 

What is the sound of one hand clapping?

BRAIN HURTS

I had the clap once, although I didn't get it from just the one hand.

Please, Bart Simpson answered that question, like, twenty years ago.

Dammit, I wanted the tree-falling-in-the-woods question!!! GIMME THE FUCKING TREE-FALLING-IN-THE WOODS QUESTION!!!!