Which banned PhilosophyForums.com member are you?

United Kingdom

Canada

Australia

China

United States of America

Question

Which of these best indicates your position on religion?

Religion is for the weak.

My religion is based on a major religion but with a lot of my own personal revelations from god added onto it.

It's my mission in life to evangelize as many people as I can.

The standard religions are relics of the past, we must worship nature if we are to survive.

I know the Truth is in the bible somewhere.

I like Greek religion.

I worship the dollar.

I like Hitler's approach.

I have no opinions on religion.

Question

What do you think of ethics?

You could not have ethics without the help of God.

Empirical philosophy is unethical, ecophilosophy has a true ethical foundation.

Christian values have poisined the world and turned everyone into mindless conformists.

I've never heard of the word before.

If sufficiently drunk, you will always do the right thing.

heeeeeeeeeeeheh hee hee hee hee philosophers of the ass of their mothers hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaha

Ethics are for the weak.

Question

Which is the best summary of your political views?

Empirical philosophy propogated by the west is destroying the world.

America is destroying the world.

Greece is good.

Theft needs to be legalized.

More government money should go to researching the number 666.

I'll say whatever I think you'll disagree with.

The governments of the world conspire to keep me from the Truth.

Question

Who's your favorite philosopher?

Berkeley

yourself

God

What's a philosopher?

all Greeks

Nietzche

Question

Which career option sounds most appealing?

tree hugger

spammer

author

cult leader

mechanic

stalker

beer taste-tester

Question

Why did you come to Philosophy Forums?

To save you all before it's too late.

Same reason a wolf joins a herd of sheep.

I need money.

I need sex.

Just got really (hic) drunk and wanted to (hic) talk.

It's big enough that it should be fun to troll.

hahaha you are all a BIG JOKE

The Truth is here somewhere, I know it.

Question

You've just been banned. What do you do now?

Fire off a series of emails to the site owner cursing him and declaring that when his philosophy brings the world to an end I'll be laughing and spitting on his grave.

Be polite about moving on to another site the admin suggests to me, then many months later start using the other site as a platform to curse the admin who banned me.

Horny girl still want guy. Philosophers impotent, she look elsewhere.

Come back under 27 new names to troll. Consult your list of anonymous proxies and repeat registration process as often as banned. Gloat.

Fill out the contact form several dozen times to remind the admins that big philosopher not scared of small philosopher, you are philosopher of ass.

Try to swing a deal with the agents who are keeping the Truth from you. Offer services.

Move on.

Question

What's your greatest accomplishment in life?

My ingenious and perfect metaphysical system.

A tie between my critically aclaimed philosophy book and my amazing sex life that I like to imagine I have.

Informing the world of its impending doom.

Becoming a fully credentialed holy prophet of the one true God, conveying his will to the masses.

Being the greatest philosopher of all time!

Getting very, very drunk.

My billions of phishing emails caught a person back in '01.

Being sexually experimental.

Proving that my username is not illogical.

The artistry with which I sneak about under new masks.

Becoming a seeker after Truth.

Question

Does the moon exist when you're not looking at it?

No, you narrow minded materialist! I can prove that, let me go into some detail...

This question is just that dreaded empirical philosophy nonsense, an ecophilosopher would get on with the details of terraforming the moon.

We're having a big sale on moon rocks today. Just come to my site and type in your credit card number, please.

I'd watch intently if you were mooning me. Please do.

The book of revelations explains that the moon bears the mark of the beast, and therefore the devil is always looking at it.

Yes, it exists.

Only if you say it doesn't.

hahahah hahahahah hahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahah select greeks know

Only if I'm sober enough to contemplate it while not looking.

Question

Why do you believe your posts are better than those of other people?

After enough posts of me reasserting my position, they give up and stop arguing with me. That means I'm right.

I am Greek.

I'm a wolf, and they're all pathetic American sheep named Bob.

Their world is coming to an end, and I'm the only one trying to stop them from destroying it.

My posts are the direct word of God as transmitted to me while I drink Ouzo.

I make more money from my posts than they do from theirs.

Because I horny and they need fly to Beijing to satisfy me.

I seek the Truth.

They fall for my trolls.

Man, I'm just so deep.

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Which banned PhilosophyForums.com member are you?

Get started with these questions...

What country do you live in (or closest to)?

Which of these best indicates your position on religion?

What do you think of ethics?

Which is the best summary of your political views?

Who's your favorite philosopher?

Which career option sounds most appealing?

Why did you come to Philosophy Forums?

You've just been banned. What do you do now?

What's your greatest accomplishment in life?

Does the moon exist when you're not looking at it?

Why do you believe your posts are better than those of other people?

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...

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