The One and Only French Cheese Test

The One and Only French Cheese Test is designed to inform you of which pathetic French cheese you most closely resemble. Now get off that couch you ox, and get those plump fingers to work the keyboard. Test created and designed by Kabir. You worship me. You know it.

Get started with these questions...


Have you ever made love to a hesitant old lady in the French subway?


When you watch porn, do you doze off and think of animals?


Are you mildly intolerant of infants carrying guns?


Was Hitler a Girl?


When drinking wine, do you often feel this inexplicable urge to prance off into the French countryside naked and sing Lenny Kravitz songs to a grazing ox?


Whenst in church, have you ever forced yourself upon the priest in unholy ways?


If you had one wish, would it be to french kiss Francois Mitterand while taking a bite out of his sandwich, while Arafat looked on in a motherly fashion?


If you were not a French cheese, what would you like to be?


Despite what people say, do you think making love to chickens is unsanitary?


When America invaded Iraq, were you more concerned with the rising costs of kababs?


And finally, what has your addled brain most learned from this test?

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...