Rum and Monkey's person of the year 2006 (part two)

Yesterday we announced our first nomination for person of the year 2006. This is the second part; we're not sure how many parts there will be. As many as we need, is the short answer; if you want to nominate someone, drop us a line, remembering to include why.

In the meantime, dear readers, here is our second nominee for person of the year:

Jesus Christ / Orko the Magician (joint nomination)

Why nominate them together? And why now? Readers, it couldn't be simpler. Jesus Christ and Orko the Magician have obvious similarities. These are two peas in a pod: popular magicians whose spells don't always go to plan, whose every adventure ends with a moral lesson. Witness:

- Jesus turns loaves into fishes when he could be overthrowing the Roman Empire and empowering the impoverished to throw off their shackles and begin a new life; Orko conjures a fish when he could be overthrowing Skeletor.

- Jesus has Christmas; Orko has the Masters of the Universe Christmas Special.

- Jesus is the Son of God, the Lord, and the eternal Word, who became man in the incarnation, so that those who believe in him might have eternal life; Orko has a magic hat.

- Jesus is a descendant of Adam, who "bit the apple" with Eve; Orko is a friend of Adam, who "held aloft his magic sword".

- Jesus has arms; Orko has Man-At-Arms. And arms.

80% of US households now go to church on a regular basis and believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. Coincidentally, exactly the same number contain at least one child or parent who secretly wants to be He-Man. Okay, so none of this is a viable reason why Jesus Christ and Orko the Magician should be people of the year. Neither of them are really people anyway. But we at Rum and Monkey think they're cool. At least, Orko is; Jesus is so in need of a makeover, but maybe once we've primped up his beard and given him a metrosexual once-over, he'll be ready to rock the party.

Tomorrow: more seasonal nominees.

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...