Article and Blog Archive

This is an archived page, for all current articles and more fun, see the Humor section.

These are all the articles we have, man. All the articles we have, in reverse chronological order. You gonna treat them nice, and then maybe we'll let you contribute one day, see?

• June 5th 2012 :: Business News
• May 22nd 2012 :: The Pekingese Falcon
• May 10th 2012 :: Five ways we plan to fight DVD piracy in 2012
• May 2nd 2012 :: Things I funded on Kickstarter
• December 2nd 2011 :: 30 second pitch: Dopamine Rush
• November 24th 2011 :: The latest additions to our investment portfolio
• November 9th 2011 :: No, I'm serious. Who the hell are you people and what do I do with you?
• July 7th 2011 :: An open letter from a do-gooder pretending to be Al Qaeda
• January 14th 2011 :: LolPalin
• November 12th 2010 :: Rum and Monkey monetization strategies: draft notes
• July 4th 2010 :: Childish Gambino
• May 31st 2010 :: Evading bears: a primer
• May 28th 2010 :: Some iPad jokes
• April 14th 2010 :: Numan and Ant: Two Great Tastes Which Taste Great Together?
• January 23rd 2010 :: EXCLUSIVE Apple Tablet blueprint
• January 23rd 2010 :: AFI Show, updates
• January 10th 2010 :: Sooooo AFI's hitting Boise
• November 19th 2009 :: Mo' Moz
• November 18th 2009 :: Great speeches through history, if they'd been made on Twitter
• November 18th 2009 :: Illuminati? In my music? It's more likely than you think!
• November 18th 2009 :: Morrissey fortnight continues!
• November 17th 2009 :: All the GaGa covers you never wanted to see.
• November 16th 2009 :: Moz fortnight!
• November 15th 2009 :: CDO and I could write a bad romance
• October 31st 2009 :: Subtle Sexuality
• October 16th 2009 :: SotD: "I Cut Like A Buffalo" by The Dead Weather
• October 8th 2009 :: Remember: Obama will kill your grandparents
• October 7th 2009 :: Fox News, you are awesome
• October 6th 2009 :: As a catchphrase, it's better than some
• October 6th 2009 :: First post! Woooo!
• October 5th 2009 :: As a catchphrase, it's better than some
• October 4th 2009 :: A new tributary to the porcine flow
• October 4th 2009 :: Bacon charlie tango foxtrot
• September 19th 2009 :: Peeg
• September 18th 2009 :: Peeg
• September 17th 2009 :: Peeg
• September 15th 2009 :: Peeg
• September 15th 2009 :: Look out! It's the nose parade
• September 15th 2009 :: Peeg
• September 13th 2009 :: More chats with CDO
• September 6th 2009 :: Album review: Blue Stone by Chris Dane Owens
• September 2nd 2009 :: Bits and Snippets
• September 1st 2009 :: SotD:"Jig of Life" by Kate Bush
• August 26th 2009 :: The NHS
• August 20th 2009 :: SotD: "I Do The Rock" by Tim Curry
• August 13th 2009 :: Depeche Mode: Review (More like unfiltered gushing)
• July 30th 2009 :: Hey kids
• July 27th 2009 :: SotD - Mr. Mister "Broken Wings"
• July 24th 2009 :: Increase the value of your home using these 4 simple techniques
• July 22nd 2009 :: Could you be an ENTREPRENEUR?
• July 20th 2009 :: 10 things we've learned from Kim Kardashian
• May 11th 2009 :: A Few Things About and Around Heaven and Hell
• February 27th 2009 :: Turn around
• January 26th 2009 :: Peeg
• January 25th 2009 :: Peeg
• January 24th 2009 :: 5 quick facts about Scotland
• January 24th 2009 :: Peeg
• November 3rd 2008 :: The Affliction Club
• October 5th 2008 :: The Factor
• September 17th 2008 :: 60 facts about Sarah Palin
• September 3rd 2008 :: Publishing: Saved!
• August 30th 2008 :: Battlestar Galactica
• August 11th 2008 :: A few lingering remains
• June 25th 2008 :: Inner Monologue and the Words I Spoke
• April 26th 2008 :: Six ultra-disruptive web companies you don't know yet
• April 20th 2008 :: MYR of LDN
• April 8th 2008 :: A party political broadcast for the apathetic, from an angry drunk
• March 16th 2008 :: Websites owned by weapons manufacturers (part two)
• March 10th 2008 :: Icelandic music is better than yours
• January 21st 2008 :: Websites owned by weapons manufacturers (part one)
• January 16th 2008 :: Top secret Steve Jobs MacWorld announcements of the future: leaked!
• January 10th 2008 :: 5 reasons why Mike Huckabee is ludicrous
• January 4th 2008 :: Five things we can expect to see now that it's 2008 and we're living in the future
• October 24th 2007 :: I live in the suburbs
• October 15th 2007 :: Men are from Mars, vampire slug beasts are from Venus
• October 6th 2007 :: Lolphysicists
• September 29th 2007 :: What would Jesus do?
• September 27th 2007 :: Oh man, I'm totally going to be so rich
• August 24th 2007 :: Comments passed in the cafeteria today about an oversized pudding
• June 11th 2007 :: The Ten Commandments: unabridged
• May 3rd 2007 :: Lolbushes
• April 30th 2007 :: News roundup: teatime
• April 24th 2007 :: Real words that deserve a second chance
• March 19th 2007 :: 20 indicators that weeping at work may be a viable plan going forward
• March 15th 2007 :: Articles we could write, but probably won't
• February 28th 2007 :: Diet plans you might like to try
• February 3rd 2007 :: Eine kleine copyright infringement
• January 31st 2007 :: Five years later and I still can't get a drink in this town
• January 29th 2007 :: Fan fiction
• January 23rd 2007 :: Travelling backwards with a fat man
• January 5th 2007 :: Our final, final answer: person of the year, yo
• December 22nd 2006 :: Rum and Monkey's person of the year: the decider
• December 22nd 2006 :: Do They Know it's Christmas
• December 22nd 2006 :: Rum and Monkey's person of the year (part three)
• December 21st 2006 :: Rum and Monkey's person of the year 2006 (part two)
• December 19th 2006 :: Rum and Monkey's person of the year 2006 (part one)
• December 19th 2006 :: Why, I'm Time Magazine's Person of the Year
• December 18th 2006 :: Your mum retorts: travel edition
• November 16th 2006 :: The right and noble thing
• October 1st 2006 :: Protect And Survive
• July 25th 2006 :: Some gameshow ideas for your consideration
• June 16th 2006 :: The politics of chess
• March 31st 2006 :: The Art of the Lie
• February 21st 2006 :: News Roundup: February 2006
• February 7th 2006 :: A vital addition to the CIA World Factbook
• February 4th 2006 :: So you’ve hired an adult contemporary rock musician
• February 1st 2006 :: So you’ve hired an Australian
• January 26th 2006 :: Breast Implants - Do Our Daughters Really Need Them?
• January 12th 2006 :: So you’ve hired a Fundy
• November 29th 2005 :: So you've hired a hippie
• October 30th 2005 :: This page used to be blank
• September 17th 2005 :: Green Street - a review
• September 14th 2005 :: Dueling Open Letters, Bluegrass Edition
• September 11th 2005 :: Jobs Osama bin Laden tried in the wake of 9/11
• September 8th 2005 :: Another Open Letter
• September 2nd 2005 :: An Open Letter to the People of America
• August 28th 2005 :: The Cloud Machines
• August 21st 2005 :: Tech Update: August 2005
• August 16th 2005 :: Skool Disko- The Night Of A Lifetime
• August 14th 2005 :: Interview: Rum and Monkey meets itself; horror ensues
• July 20th 2005 :: Narcisse - Volume III
• July 18th 2005 :: The World's Wildest Police Horoscopes
• July 16th 2005 :: Art
• June 8th 2005 :: An official guide to the Land of the Engles
• June 6th 2005 :: Dispatches from the 2005 World Cup
• May 27th 2005 :: Injuries I inflicted on myself during Star Wars III
• May 16th 2005 :: The Letters Of Lackwell Piddletrenthide
• May 10th 2005 :: The Generic Cinema
• May 8th 2005 :: God Speaks!
• May 3rd 2005 :: Performance Review: The Gods of Olympus
• May 1st 2005 :: Free Range Office Solutions
• April 29th 2005 :: My Dead Friend
• April 27th 2005 :: Exciting Ways To Pass Time In Meetings
• April 25th 2005 :: A Day In the Life of a Film Extra
• April 21st 2005 :: Hobbies: The British Alternative To Life
• April 19th 2005 :: Five things I learned this week (vol 3)
• April 17th 2005 :: As best as I remember
• April 15th 2005 :: Splendid
• April 13th 2005 :: Not the 10 O'clock News: The Papal Special
• April 11th 2005 :: Hallowed be thy name
• April 7th 2005 :: News Roundup: April 2005
• March 28th 2005 :: Interview: Javelins O'Callaghan
• March 26th 2005 :: People in the Cinema
• March 22nd 2005 :: News Roundup: March 2005
• March 16th 2005 :: Diary of an Internet Musician 2002
• March 14th 2005 :: Choccy
• March 11th 2005 :: And Now, A Commercial Break
• March 9th 2005 :: Not the 10 O'Clock News
• March 7th 2005 :: Personal Performance Review: George W. Bush
• March 5th 2005 :: PANIC STRICKEN
• March 3rd 2005 :: Thoughts inspired by a soda bottle.
• March 1st 2005 :: London Underground: The Walkthrough
• February 25th 2005 :: A eulogy of sorts
• February 23rd 2005 :: Aspects of the Gents' Toilets - or The Unbearable Lightness of Peeing
• February 21st 2005 :: Fixing the 'Ferno, yo
• February 19th 2005 :: Jamba!
• February 17th 2005 :: The epicurean folly
• February 15th 2005 :: A brief and very relevant history of the Fox Television Network
• February 13th 2005 :: Religious Right?
• February 12th 2005 :: J is for British
• February 10th 2005 :: Books in the Bookshop
• January 30th 2005 :: 2004 Person of the Year (Part 5) (Part 2)
• January 27th 2005 :: 2004 Person of the Year (Part 5) (Part 1)
• January 13th 2005 :: 2004 Person of the Year (Part 4)
• January 4th 2005 :: 2004 Person of the Year (Part 3)
• January 3rd 2005 :: 2004 Person of the Year (Part 2)
• January 2nd 2005 :: 2004 Person of the Year (Part 1)
• December 23rd 2004 :: Living out the British dream on British TV
• December 21st 2004 :: Living out the American dream on American TV
• December 17th 2004 :: Merry something or other
• December 8th 2004 :: 27 dreams I've had about flying
• December 6th 2004 :: Waiting outside Lush, Christmas 2004
• December 4th 2004 :: The Fine Art Of The Covering Letter
• November 30th 2004 :: How to stop worrying and love the Bush
• November 26th 2004 :: News Roundup: NOW
• November 20th 2004 :: Unobituary: Lucius Behaviour-Amberchap DPhil
• November 18th 2004 :: I went to University once!
• November 16th 2004 :: Five things I learned this week
• October 28th 2004 :: Hispanification
• October 26th 2004 :: Exorcise Your Right
• October 23rd 2004 :: How to Teach
• October 21st 2004 :: Corporate Voicemail System
• October 8th 2004 :: Useful Debate Transcript
• September 22nd 2004 :: Happy Hour
• September 20th 2004 :: Who Will Vet The Vets?
• September 18th 2004 :: An Interview With Google
• September 17th 2004 :: Deleted Scenes
• September 15th 2004 :: An A to Z of my favourite noises
• September 10th 2004 :: Dear Gregor
• September 8th 2004 :: There Is No Pressing Need To Panic
• September 5th 2004 :: Dear Bushy
• September 4th 2004 :: NEWS! ROUNDUP! NOW!
• September 2nd 2004 :: John F Kerry: A Harder Message And A Bold, Bold Future
• September 1st 2004 :: The Confessions of Johnny the Nose - Mafia Man
• August 31st 2004 :: Days of our Knives
• August 30th 2004 :: My nose
• August 25th 2004 :: My Fellow Americans
• August 21st 2004 :: Rum and Monkey: The Interview
• July 19th 2004 :: The Victorian Breakfast
• July 14th 2004 :: Marmolada
• July 9th 2004 :: Taking it to the people
• July 8th 2004 :: He is, she is
• July 4th 2004 :: Thoughts from an airport lounge
• June 18th 2004 :: There Are No Magic Bullets
• June 3rd 2004 :: Literature for the Imminently Dead
• June 2nd 2004 :: A Revolutionary Weight Loss Plan That Will Leave You Gaunt!
• May 25th 2004 :: A Paid Message
• May 19th 2004 :: Workplace Relations
• May 14th 2004 :: Seven Golden Rules for the writing of Satire
• May 3rd 2004 :: The Baroness Visits an Old Friend
• April 28th 2004 :: Letter to the future
• April 19th 2004 :: I'm an investigative journalist
• April 13th 2004 :: This Morning
• April 11th 2004 :: Journey to the Centre of the Pub
• April 8th 2004 :: What He Saw
• April 7th 2004 :: A manifestation of everything that is wrong and right
• March 30th 2004 :: Stop Press! For I Am Trapped Inside
• March 26th 2004 :: The Escape
• March 23rd 2004 :: LiveJournal
• March 20th 2004 :: Numbers
• March 8th 2004 :: Brent Gardiner Syndrome
• March 5th 2004 :: Insert pussy joke here
• February 29th 2004 :: Miss Caitlin's Health and Beauty Column
• February 24th 2004 :: Delicious Cakes of Pan
• February 17th 2004 :: Hitler: His Part in His Downfall
• February 9th 2004 :: You know the type
• February 2nd 2004 :: Yay, Republicans
• January 30th 2004 :: Sometimes I Like to Buy Things
• January 26th 2004 :: Person of the Year (Part 5)
• January 25th 2004 :: Person of the Year (Part 4)
• January 24th 2004 :: Person of the Year (Part 3)
• January 22nd 2004 :: This Is Beginning To Get Tedious
• January 20th 2004 :: A Brief Tale that Actually Happened
• January 6th 2004 :: Person of the Year (Part 2)
• January 5th 2004 :: Person of the Year (Part 1)
• December 25th 2003 :: Watching "Kes" with my Mum
• December 20th 2003 :: Review of the Year: 2003
• November 28th 2003 :: Uncle Oprah Touched Me
• November 20th 2003 :: News Roundup: November 2003
• November 11th 2003 :: Staying Home
• October 12th 2003 :: House of "Mouse"
• October 8th 2003 :: My life in a big road trip around the UK
• September 24th 2003 :: Batman Through The Ages (Part III)
• September 23rd 2003 :: Batman Through The Ages (Part II)
• September 22nd 2003 :: Batman Through The Ages (Part I)
• September 20th 2003 :: Memoirs from the Dreaming Spires
• September 16th 2003 :: A Train Journey
• September 8th 2003 :: Childrens' Letters to Dog
• September 6th 2003 :: Planning Applications of the World
• September 3rd 2003 :: The First Great Rum and Monkey Writing Competition
• August 27th 2003 :: Fun Ways to Quit Your Job at the Coffee Stand
• August 19th 2003 :: Indiana: "Ten Happens Now"
• August 15th 2003 :: Shopping and other Tortures
• August 10th 2003 :: 1998 and all that (a final goodbye)
• August 7th 2003 :: Benjamin and the Fish Machine
• August 3rd 2003 :: Shooting the Breeze
• August 1st 2003 :: Sven: The Movie
• July 23rd 2003 :: No paperclips though
• July 19th 2003 :: Wherever I hang my hat
• July 16th 2003 :: News Roundup: July 2003
• June 23rd 2003 :: Reiterations
• June 10th 2003 :: It's Probably Dietary
• June 4th 2003 :: Iterations
• May 27th 2003 :: News Roundup: Business Special
• May 22nd 2003 :: Your Questions Answered
• May 16th 2003 :: Political Discourse Vol. 2. - The Commune Strikes Back
• May 11th 2003 :: Overheard While Channel Flipping
• May 9th 2003 :: The Dundee Gun Amnesty
• May 6th 2003 :: New Old Government for Scotland
• May 2nd 2003 :: Political Discourse Vol I. - Finding a Voice
• April 11th 2003 :: The Real Manual
• April 6th 2003 :: News Roundup: April 2003
• March 28th 2003 :: This Week on TV
• March 24th 2003 :: Thingbook
• March 20th 2003 :: Obituary: Professor Wilson-Wilson St.John, DPhil (Oxon.)
• March 18th 2003 :: The Liberal Dictionary
• March 17th 2003 :: Irresponsibility
• March 15th 2003 :: World Taken Aback by Iraq Attack
• March 13th 2003 :: The Republican Dictionary
• March 5th 2003 :: Ignorance is Strength!
• February 28th 2003 :: Your Tech Update
• February 19th 2003 :: News roundup: February 2003
• February 17th 2003 :: The Saints
• February 13th 2003 :: Family
• February 7th 2003 :: Fan Mail
• January 26th 2003 :: Get your credit cards ready
• January 24th 2003 :: FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
• January 22nd 2003 :: A distinct lack of inspiration
• January 14th 2003 :: Greetings from beyond
• January 10th 2003 :: Narcisse - Volume II
• January 6th 2003 :: Danger Money
• December 30th 2002 :: A brief dissertation on a subject of utmost importance
• December 26th 2002 :: Performance Review: The Four Horsemen
• December 22nd 2002 :: In the Beginning
• December 17th 2002 :: The Morlocks of Suburbia
• December 15th 2002 :: Babylon's Burning
• December 7th 2002 :: A little knowledge ...
• December 3rd 2002 :: Holy Oleo!
• December 1st 2002 :: The True Spirit of Christmas
• November 23rd 2002 :: Narcisse - Volume I
• November 20th 2002 :: Memoirs from Cow Town
• November 19th 2002 :: Confessions of a secret agent
• November 10th 2002 :: News roundup: November 2002
• November 4th 2002 :: Selected scenes from hit movies in Monster World (part one)
• October 28th 2002 :: Exposé
• October 22nd 2002 :: News roundup: October 2002
• October 21st 2002 :: Six Degrees
• October 16th 2002 :: The Oedipus Complex and Star Wars
• October 14th 2002 :: Some rejection letters
• October 12th 2002 :: More bizarre laws for your titillation
• October 10th 2002 :: An Account of my Recent Trip to the Isle of Skye...
• October 8th 2002 :: What the Christians believe
• October 3rd 2002 :: Me for office
• September 22nd 2002 :: I went to the movies
• September 19th 2002 :: Be a real student
• September 10th 2002 :: September 11th tie-ins that didn't make the grade
• September 8th 2002 :: What must they think of me?
• September 7th 2002 :: A Modern Bestiary
• September 4th 2002 :: Defenders of the Earth?
• September 3rd 2002 :: The Chocolate War
• August 31st 2002 :: Digital age
• August 29th 2002 :: A Day in the Life in the Temporal Anomaly
• August 28th 2002 :: Pre-Democracy and its Discontents
• August 26th 2002 :: The Liquid Fun Update
• August 24th 2002 :: Advertising
• August 21st 2002 :: Jobby
• August 19th 2002 :: An interview with my sister
• August 16th 2002 :: News roundup: August 2002
• August 15th 2002 :: America Loses State
• August 7th 2002 :: War II: the Remake
• August 5th 2002 :: 3000AD
• August 2nd 2002 :: A funny thing happened on the way to the forum
• July 31st 2002 :: Whither Postpostmodernism?
• July 29th 2002 :: Something by way of an explanation
• July 26th 2002 :: News Roundup: Juny 2002
• July 24th 2002 :: Ping Me, Daddy!
• July 22nd 2002 :: Coping with Monday
• July 19th 2002 :: A faintly sinister monologue
• July 17th 2002 :: Love. Hate. Evil.
• July 14th 2002 :: The Soul of Wit
• June 20th 2002 :: Web searches you used to find us
• June 6th 2002 :: Submit
• May 26th 2002 :: The Full Carry On and a Funeral's Diary
• May 17th 2002 :: An Open Letter to Tony Blair
• May 7th 2002 :: George W. Bush: The Interview
• May 2nd 2002 :: News roundup: May 2002
• April 28th 2002 :: Wildoats: confessions of a troll
• April 25th 2002 :: The Kunnst File
• April 19th 2002 :: Frankie 1212: The Interview
• April 18th 2002 :: Notes From on High
• April 17th 2002 :: News Roundup: April 2002
• April 16th 2002 :: This Week's News: The Odds
• April 9th 2002 :: Hastily Thrown-Together Wednesday: Uber Bombing
• April 3rd 2002 :: Shoulder To Cry On
• March 28th 2002 :: News roundup: March 2002
• March 27th 2002 :: Your essay assignment
• March 24th 2002 :: Monkey's Potted History of Feminism
• March 23rd 2002 :: My inner hell
• March 19th 2002 :: Election Chaos in World
• March 19th 2002 :: World Mourns as Man Dies
• March 11th 2002 :: That Bush wants to sit down and have a crumpet
• March 7th 2002 :: Dear Sir
• March 4th 2002 :: That girl
• February 28th 2002 :: Poem 2
• February 26th 2002 :: Science: a piece of cake?
• February 20th 2002 :: One-dimensional minds
• February 19th 2002 :: Settling the Score
• February 17th 2002 :: When gods wrestle
• February 13th 2002 :: Please Stop Punching My Monkey
• February 9th 2002 :: 11 Appealing Openings
• February 7th 2002 :: Lost in white space
• February 6th 2002 :: Be like me: a practical how-to guide
• February 3rd 2002 :: War, Huh?
• January 30th 2002 :: Pulp Ibsen
• January 30th 2002 :: When John met Julie
• January 30th 2002 :: A poem