Which One of My Books Do You Most Resemble?

I don't really understand anything besides math and computers, sorry.

Scheiße! *mumble*

No, but I have a clue where you'd like to spend the night, sweetheart.

I'm so lost.

No...but if it's evil, I'll destroy it for you!

Of course I do, you twit. I am educated, after all.

Question

Have you murdered and/or been a witness to the murder of a dog recently?

Yes, I had my slave kill a most odious pooch the other day.

That's what I've been trying to telling you!

Der Hund? Nein.

Sounds kinky.

Yes, but I apologized, didn't I?

What! Sounds like something You-Know-Who would do...

Question

If you could own any type of vehicle, what would it be?

A chariot, most definitely.

I usually just ride my bike, and that's all I need.

A Volkswagen, ja!

I have my quick feet to get me around, thank you very much.

Space ship.

I usually just use floo powder.

Question

Do you find yourself appearing in court regularly?

I *invented* the court, you nit-wit!

Well, no, but *someone* should...they killed that dog!

We already paid our war reparations, swine!

Sadly, yes. But I always dig my way out somehow.

Court? Not really...do they have those on Venus?

I did once. And it was a load of shite.

Question

Are you British?

Those heathens? I should think not. We conquered their butts.

Yeah.

English pig-dogs! Swine! Bastards!

I turn my nose up at them.

'Course I am, you bloody plonker.

Yup, and so are all me mates.

Question

Has anything ever inexplicably broken when you're angry?

If I get angry, I don't wait for things to break. I break them myself.

You actually believe that paranormal magic crap? Give me a break.

Things break all the time, wherever I go.

No, but I'm good at breakin' hearts, baby.

Oh, I guess that would explain the trail of debris behind me...

Yes. I've always wondered about that. I always thought it was my imagination.

This is a user-written post. Rum and Monkey isn't responsible for its content, however good it may be. Please report any inappropriate content.

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...

Which Evil Criminal are You?

The Emo Name Generator

Which Walking Dead Character Are You?

What is going on inside your head?

Which One Direction Band Member Do You Have The Most In Common With?

Which Fast & Furious Character Are You?

Which U.S. President Are You?

What Should Your Personal Font Be?

Which Lego Set is Your Alternate Reality?

WANT MORE FUNNY LIKE THIS? FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK

Which One of My Books Do You Most Resemble?

Get started with these questions...

Do you have any clue what the word "ablative" means?

Have you murdered and/or been a witness to the murder of a dog recently?

If you could own any type of vehicle, what would it be?

Do you find yourself appearing in court regularly?

Are you British?

Has anything ever inexplicably broken when you're angry?

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...

Popular Content

Which Evil Criminal are You?

The Emo Name Generator

Which Walking Dead Character Are You?

What is going on inside your head?

Which One Direction Band Member Do You Have The Most In Common With?

Which Fast & Furious Character Are You?

Which U.S. President Are You?

What Should Your Personal Font Be?

Which Lego Set is Your Alternate Reality?