Rum and Monkey

The finer things in life, of course.

Whateva. I do what I want.

Disapproving of all things extravagant or silly and feeling important.

Saving my money for collagen injections.

Pitying the plight of the fool.

Remembering to take my mood stabilizers.

Question

Describe your fashion sense.

Extremely high-end and well-fitting attire.

Some days I wear Hawaiian shirts and others I may wear my steel-toed military issue boots. It all depends on my mood.

Usually whatever I can find on the floor.

Anything completely functional and proper for my station.

Anything with a little personality that has a pocket for my handkerchief.

Anything, really. Some gold medallions, faded denim ... As long as it doesn't look like a uniform.

Question

Word Association: Twitch.

That is highly inappropriate.

Bunny Nose.

Twat! ehehe Hey, I don't know. Just trying to lighten the mood.

Anger.

Fashion.

Man Spunk.

Question

Obliterated a village?

I pity the fool.

That always happens when I go off my medication.

Of course. This is war, after all.

I even had a new uniform made to commemorate the occasion.

Whoa there, buddy! That would take, like, a lot of work.

Only with my overwhelming man-musk!

Question

Are you now, or have you ever been, a flaming homosexual?

I just dress like one.

Not that I can remember. I do a lot of weird stuff when my personality switches, though.

No. We just played a lot of naked leap-frog in Junior SS Camp. Discipline!

Honey, you know I can't tell you that. But I can show you. * wipes drool from lips *

No.

I don't feel like expending the energy to recall such information. Care for a pina colada?

Question

Whatcha gonna do 'bout it, huh?

Twitch and squeal like a pig.

Punk.

Have a new suit tailored PRONTO!

Absolutely nothing, and that's okay!

I will notify the Führer immediately!

Nothing at first. But later I will kill you in a fit of rage.

Question

Gloves ...

should be respectfully cared for, as they are a part of my uniform which represents my authority.

should always coordinate smashingly with my ensemble.

should be used to bitchslap underlings while I'm in an inexplicable fit of temper!

can be quite kinky, really. They also serve as a nice place in which to tuck my handkerchief.

are just another something I'll end up losing. Nobody expects my uniform to be perfect, anyway.

Only nancy boys wear gloves, yo.

Question

Do you have a scar?

Yes. A ludicrous one.

Yes. I notice them when I wake up from black-outs.

A very private one I received from a Greek sailor ...

No. Wordly sophisticates don't have scars.

Yes. I received it serving my country.

Brace yo'self.

Question

Smile!

Absolutely not.

You don't even have to ask.

Give me something to smile about, sweetcheeks!

Charmingly and when the situation calls for it.

Give me an hour or so for my meds to kick in.

Don't be a punk, yo.

Question

Music ...

should be of the classical variety and thoroughly appreciated.

is a silly waste of time.

Duran Duran is definitely to be listened to during naughty adventures in the boudoir.

Bob Marley goes great with my attitude towards life.

I listen to everything from Peter, Paul, and Mary to Cannibal Corpse.

I like music from the 80's.

Question

Finally, what do you think of Rum and Monkey?

Honey, it's fabulous!

Not enough blondes for my tastes, to be honest.

I always enjoy it when I can be arsed to come online.

It's far too silly to be legal! The Führer will hear about this, you can be sure.

I love it unless I hate it.

Be cool. Stay in school. I pity the fool.

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The Nazi General Test!

Get started with these questions...

What is your driving passion?

Describe your fashion sense.

Word Association: Twitch.

Obliterated a village?

Are you now, or have you ever been, a flaming homosexual?

Whatcha gonna do 'bout it, huh?

Gloves ...

Do you have a scar?

Smile!

Music ...

Finally, what do you think of Rum and Monkey?

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...

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