The Republican Bill Name Generator

Liberals: they make us sick as pigs. Lording it over us with their foreign-born, non-Christian, death-panel-forming, probably-Martian, pie-loving President. They think they're so compassionate, yet they kill babies, hate Jesus, protest against Wall Street instead of getting a real job, and want to turn Christmas into Leftmas. Their hate speech is killing America.

But here's a secret for you. There's a way to take the leftists down. Here's how: legislation.

We're going to take you - all of you - and turn you into a peoples' army of free market capitalism. That's right. We're going to assign you a bill name and send you out into the thick of the legislative branch to do ideological battle for liberty.

All you have to do - and make no mistake, soldier, you don't have a choice when it comes to freedom - is fill in your first and last names below, and we'll turn you into . You can thank us later when we've rid our soil of the leftski menace once and for all.

One nation under God, under Reagan, under God.