Ping Me, Daddy!

Who is Scott Bakula and what is he thinking?- "Sam Beckett would never say anything this stupid. God this guy's a moron. That actress who plays Hoshi blanked me again. Bitch. Are those breasts real? Who says Vulcans have to have such big boobs? Bet that dork who plays the doctor is going to start leering at her again as soon as the cameras flick off. Do these pants have to be so tight? What a perv. Would never go for him. Breath smells of cat shit. Wonder how many seasons this one will run before I'm bored? A, who am I kidding, I'm a whore. Work for work for work for. Money, money, money... Letterman tomorrow. I think I'll wear the white shirt- if I lean back I'll show chest hair. She's flaunting those things again...put them away woman. Am I gay?" Who is the gladiator and what is he thinking?- "My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And your shopping bags really chafed my wrists. I must express my extreme dissatisfaction with the level of service at your store. The floors were a disgrace and if your jam doughnuts were fresh I wear pink panties. It hurts to get service this bad. Really dude, clear this shit up. Word." Who is Britney Spears and what is she thinking?- "I wonder how many times I should touch myself. Right that's one, is that enough? Shouldn't I be better lit here? Maybe once more. Mmmm, am I meant to enjoy it? My breasts hurt. Am I gay?" Who is George W. Bush and what is he thinking?- "In cyberspace, without a livejournal, no one can hear you scream..."