FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

GB Publishing is proud to present The God Diaries – Life Everlasting, a scintillating collection of musings taken directly from the daily journal of The Almighty Himself. Several billion years in the making, this tome presents the reader with insights unimaginable – a rich tapestry covering everything from the banal to the truly extraordinary. From His humble beginnings floating aimlessly in empty space, we follow the career of a quirky deity through the creation of the Universe, the astonishing achievement of creating all life in just six days, through to his often stormy relationships with the Pope, Allah and of course, Buddha. This is a frank and candid view of the deity we love to hate, as he bares his considerable soul and offers a window into an existence which has puzzled mankind for generations. All the big questions are answered – “Why do some animals look so weird?”, “How does space work?” and “How precisely did the United States electoral system come into being?” Some of the warmest entries in this diary are all about us. God’s keen interest in our gradual discovery of how the earth functions around, and often in spite of, us shows through in his careful documentation of life on this planet - and others. Some excerpts from The God Diaries – Life Everlasting. “I did some excellent smiting today. I’m so proud that I’ve decided to appear in the sky tomorrow. Tried beef for dinner – it’s not bad. Must do something about making the innards a bit tastier.” “Today I set fire to Sodom and Gomorrah. It was kind of cool, but I’m worried about the message it will send. All of the men I meant to have evolve into priests might end up being persecuted for generations to come. I hope I’ve done the right thing.” “Couldn’t sleep for the incessant noise of prayer. I probably shouldn’t have told them that I can hear every word they’re saying. Every. Fucking. Word. They could at least remember to say Amen when they’re done... I don’t need to listen to them talk to their doctors – it makes me uncomfortable.” “I’ve made the most wonderful woman. Her name is Mary, and one day the humans will worship her as I do. I wonder how I can get her to notice me. I can’t decide between sending her roses and chocolates, or an angel.” About the Author: Responsible for the original Word (see Genesis 1:1, The Bible), God went on to create a plethora of remarkable works. But it was His Ten Commandments, widely regarded as some of the most concise literature of our time, that really put God on the literary map. The God Diaries look set to put all of these works to shame. But don’t take our word for it – here are some testimonials from others that have read this book: “A playful romp ... on a scale never before imagined.” St Matthew. “It doesn’t suck... [God’s] musings on the inherent sadness of the human condition are worth the price of the book alone.” Lucifer. “I knew him before he was famous. He’s as down to earth today as he was when I slept with him.” Mary The God Diaries are available in hardback only. RRP $99.95. God is available for interview and limited appearances. Conditions do apply; please contact Gregor Stronach via Rum & Monkey for interview times and general media enquiries.

What do you think, did we get it right? Comment here...

WANT MORE FUNNY LIKE THIS? FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK